• grandma: DO YOU WANT AN APPLE
  • me: no thanks grandma
  • grandma: HERES YOUR APPLE

carriesfirstperiod:

my mom just looked at a spider at our kitchen and yelled “why do you have to be like that? you dont need that many eyes or legs you need to stop”

duplication:

the sad moment when you realize you only have 1 maybe 2 true friends

vegetarain:

when you were going to copy off ur friend but they didnt do the homework

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queenchrissycumberbatch:

my friendship comes in 3 levels:

1) sass 

2) insults

3) inappropriate sexual humor. 

genies:

the biggest disappointment in life is when good shows have a bad episode like i waited a week and u give me this shit